These Ancient Eyes: Monday Musings…

Monday, May 30, 2011

Yes, I know – the new post in Shift Happens is supposed to be here today, but as a result of my own procrastination and then some upsetting news, I haven’t finished it yet. Don’t worry about the series, it WILL be along as soon as I finish it (not going to wait for next Monday if I don’t absolutely have to), but for now I just have some thoughts I feel the need to share.

Last night, a good friend of mine, and my employer in Second Life, lost someone very important and close to her in a shocking and unexpected way, and it’s made me reflect some upon my own life and my relationships with others… and the fact that the unthinkable does happen.

Sometimes, when you lose someone, it’s a long, drawn out occurrance and you have time to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the inevitable. But other times, such as the case of my friend (nameless here to protect her identity, both Online and Offline), it’s sudden and horrible and unexpected in the extreme.

Like every encounter I’ve had with Death, be it personal, through dreams, or vicariously through friends and family, this has made me stop and think. My physical body isn’t in the greatest of condition. I have joint problems, I have a bad back, I’m overweight, my brain chemistry isn’t the most stable thing in the world, and I get migraines just from being outside in sunlight these days, without sunglasses on. (And I mean even a short walk out to my car to grab something.) But my friend’s mate who departed the world last night, was in excellent physical condition (to my knowledge), and it would be far more likely to expect what happened to him to happen to a person in my condition than in his.

It just brings into stark relief that this world is not a fair place, and life and death can be just as arbitrary as the decision whether or not to have coffee in the morning.

I can’t properly say that I am in mourning, for I never met or spoke to this man – but I am upset and supportive of my friend, and I hope she knows that. I’m there for whatever she needs me to do in Second Life, and if there’s anything I can do in First Life for her as well, I hope she’ll let me know.